Even when it necessarily tackles the difficulties that are part and parcel of same-sex love in the 20th century, there’s something pleasant about the way A Secret Love is told. The documentary puts Terry and Pat’s love above all else, so even though we hear about how they had to tear the bottom pages of their letters to avoid getting caught, or how they had to split from close family members after coming out, things never feel too heavy or dire because at the end of the day, they’re still together, their decades-old companionship a beautiful example of how love wins. And aside from giving us an intimate look at this rare win for elderly closeted couples, A Secret Love serves as an insightful portrait of elderly life. Terry and Pat, with their perseverance and unyielding support, make aging look beautiful rather than scary. 

Much of the film’s tension comes from the fraught relationship between Pat and Terry’s niece, Diana. The two love Terry dearly, but it turns into a competition almost of who loves Terry more and who should be near her during her twilight years. It reads trivial on paper, but it’s actually one of the most relatable parts of the film, that passionate rivalry that can only come from too much love. The heated discussion Pat and Diana engage in is absolutely one of the highlights of the film, and its resolution a masterclass in solving familial woes.